Growin' & GLOWIN'!

You know the saying...  "He may not come when you want him, but He's always right on time." Feels cliche sometimes, but I have experienced some "right on time" moments in my life. Like when I was buying a house and starting grad school simultaneously. Well, I've been pondering on His timing a little bit lately. See, I've been invisible most of life. Unseen, unnoticed, unrecognized, unappreciated. Let the record show that I've also been "great" all my life. I am an achiever and have many accomplishments under my name, and am very impressive on paper. I support my friends and am ALWAYS in the mood to celebrate. That's probably linked to trauma. You know, because I'm rarely celebrated, but that is not the point of this post. 😂 As I've been invisible for most of my life, it seems that lately, I'm less invisible. And I'm questioning it... Because I don't really know how to deal with the attention. Being transparent here....

I’ve shared with you how things went left, but now I have to tell you how they went right. Things really do work together for good for those who are called according to purpose (Romans 8:28).  The biggest lesson for me through all of this time was and is still Trust. During this time, there have also been lessons in Obedience, Self-Worth/Image and of course, Faith. I have no problem putting my faith in God, but do I trust, do I believe that He is going to do what He says? That's the real tea. Trust is first because there are so many layers to trust that have applied to my life in this time. I’ve had to trust that God really does have my best interest in mind, even when it didn’t appear to be true. I’ve had to trust (and still do) that God will do what He says He will, and that His words are in fact true, even when I have grounds to be skeptical. I’ve had to trust myself too. I’ve had to trust in my relationship with my Heavenly Father; trusting that it is real, that it is valid, an...

So the story continues... October was ending and I was nervous again. I reached out to some company that I thought could offer monetary assistance with mortgages and other housing needs. I found them through internet research, read up on them, looked up their government designator and decided they were legit. Well, "the only assistance we can offer you at this time is planning assistance. We can plan a budget with you..." Ma'am. That's not what I need. Thank you. What I need is income. “God, what are we doing here?” is what I was thinking as she was telling me all the un-useful things she can help me with. So, that was a dud.  It's finally November. We’re three months into this entrepreneurship journey, and I’m looking like “uh, sir? Is this what you had in mind?” Because at this point, I haven't paid my mortgage or my car in 3 months, and my house don't have a garage for me to hide my car in. It's getting realer by the day. I believed in what God show...

I am literally buzzing from that amazing weekend I had with my three best girlies at the time, and the cherry on top was God answering my prayer. My “I don’t feel like I’m doing what you want me to do anymore, so what’s next?” prayer. He led me to the door and showed me what was behind it. It was scary and exciting and a little bit crazy, but aren’t your dreams supposed to frighten you a little bit? That’s what “they” say. “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough”. Well, it was massive and very scary to say the least. I was ready to run straight into it though, because I knew God gave it to me. And, in the Bible, there are countless times that God had people doing things that seemed crazy to the onlookers. Me and God had been rocking with each other for quite some time, and he had established with me that I could trust him to lead me. I had already been living a submitted life and decided that I’d live according to His will, so after my birthday weekend, I was READY. I w...

So, yeah, this story starts at the beginning of the 2021-2022 school year. I was excited for a new year, but simultaneously, I was feeling some… Is disdain the word? Something like joy and excitement but laced with a little dread. Yeah, something like that. So, you know, it’s time for me to start getting things in order, so I began organizing and thinking about the systems I wanted to put in place. I decided that I was only working during work hours, so I had to figure out how to get the “extra” stuff done during the day. Once I felt I had my systems in place, I was able to switch gears to other things on the task list, like creating my “Welcome to Class” letter, and updating my syllabi. The basic beginning of the year stuff. Okay, so the kids have arrived and I started teaching the systems and setting the policies in place and everything was going well. Like, very well. I figured since it was my 6th year, it should be smooth, and it actually was. Parent communication was going well, ...